The Artichoke

[Pirate Bear]

You may not be aware of it, but they have already devoured your soul. They also trick you very well into believing that they are all Angels. They have pulled the fur over your eyes or maybe whispered ideas and actions for you to do the next day while you were asleep.

I refuse to believe that my angels were sadistic, manipulative, scheming engines of mind control. It only seems that way when you're scooping poop out of a litter box.

[sableagle]

This morning the cock pheasant was busy trying to see off his reflection in the glass where there used to be a barn door again. The one hen he's picked up this year was just exploring the bottom of the window. Later I went past another window and scared her off the outside sill there. It's level with the lawn, so the cock has occasionally flown across to have a go at the rival he saw on another lawn five feet into the room but the hen was just sitting there, pretty much roosting against the glass.

[Branwen]

Nope. I didn't terrify them.

I've had 5 cats (plus 13 kittens for a short amount of time) and they were all well behaved. I didn't even train them. Oh, sure, there was the occasional poo behind the couch, but none of them ever tried to devour my soul.

You may not be aware of it, but they have already devoured your soul. They also trick you very well into believing that they are all Angels. They have pulled the fur over your eyes or maybe whispered ideas and actions for you to do the next day while you were asleep.

My current owner allows me to sleep in at times. Other times she's waking me up at about 4 or 5 in the morning. She's quite vocal (hence her name: Siren). She will usually admonish me in the morning for not having fed her while I was asleep, pet her when she wanted to be petted. She'll also get quite vocal when I come home from work and meet me at the bottom of the stairs and fuss at me until I talk to her & promise to feed her.
Last night she got a wild hair up her butt and went about the apartment at full Nascar speeds and ended up upside down on the cat tower with the look of I truly meant to do this. Afterwards she attacked a cat toy, scared herself by walking past a sock and then took about 20 minutes to stare at the frogs then she curled up on the back of the chair and slept for about 2 hours.

When I die, I want to come back as a very pampered and well loved cat. Just like to one that I currently own. Okay... She owns me. I just happen to be here to feed her and scratch her ears when she wants it.

[Pirate Bear]

Nope. I didn't terrify them.

I've had 5 cats (plus 13 kittens for a short amount of time) and they were all well behaved. I didn't even train them. Oh, sure, there was the occasional poo behind the couch, but none of them ever tried to devour my soul.

[KiaKat]

Ah...


Reading these pet stories, you all must have had some special needs cats, or something, because every can I've ever had was an angel.

Did you terrify them, or something? Most of the cats I've had in my life (currently on #'s 7 and 8, I think) have been the ones who've ruled the roost, so to speak. I've managed to train them in some important things, but mostly they just sit there and stare at me until I do what they want. Or, they wait till I've left, then go sit on the kitchen counter.

EDIT: Both my current cats, and all my previous cats, except one, have been incredibly intelligent. Almost too much so, especially once combined with their immense creativity.

[Pirate Bear]

I don't really know what he did with the artichoke. I just figured it sounded random. When you walk into the room and the cat is trying to look as innocent as possible you know he's done something.

Ah...


Reading these pet stories, you all must have had some special needs cats, or something, because every can I've ever had was an angel.

[Falconess]

One of my friends had a parrot, and this was a right evil creature. Only one time have i ever ran away from an animal and this was it.

My friends father possessed a pen knife (one of the ones that the blade folds into the handle) and one time me and my friend were sitting watching T.V. and the parrot lands on the television set with said knife in his claws,We think thats a bit odd but pay it no mind then two seconds later it holds the knife in it's claws and begins using it's beak to open the knife it was at this point we fled the armed parrot and didn't go back in again for a while.

Scary scary parrot...coulda been worse...I think. Kinda cool though. I mean, think about it, you'd be the coolest pirate on the ocean. Your bird fights back. Arrrr!

[KiaKat]

Hehehe. Armed parrot.

[William]

One of my friends had a parrot, and this was a right evil creature. Only one time have i ever ran away from an animal and this was it.

My friends father possessed a pen knife (one of the ones that the blade folds into the handle) and one time me and my friend were sitting watching T.V. and the parrot lands on the television set with said knife in his claws,We think thats a bit odd but pay it no mind then two seconds later it holds the knife in it's claws and begins using it's beak to open the knife it was at this point we fled the armed parrot and didn't go back in again for a while.

[Evandril]

My youngest dog is too smart for her own good...If we leave home for too long, she'll open cabinets to get out things to eat...The ones that still have baby-latches on 'em *shakes head*

[Falconess]

Oh my (newish) couches are in ribbons. I'll have to get them reupholstered at some point soon. That's ok, though. I'm pretty sure I know what fabric I would want.

But all that's from the cats destroying their scratching post, and me being too lazy and broke to get a new one. I have a really nice cat condo on backorder from Petco, it should be only another couple weeks till it comes.

Eep! Baaad Baad kitties. Yeah, the clear tape works wonders. Beatings work nicely too. However I have to agree with sableagle, chainmail :laughs:

[sableagle]

I'm pretty sure I know what fabric I would want.

Chainmail?

[KiaKat]

Oh my (newish) couches are in ribbons. I'll have to get them reupholstered at some point soon. That's ok, though. I'm pretty sure I know what fabric I would want.

But all that's from the cats destroying their scratching post, and me being too lazy and broke to get a new one. I have a really nice cat condo on backorder from Petco, it should be only another couple weeks till it comes.

[Sehson]

We've discovered that if she has room on the bed and pettins in the morning, she doesn't destroy the dresser trying to get our attention.

Moving the thing out of the bedroom (and pretending it's a buffet or sideboard) will also help.

one of my cats would attack the couch when he was feeling dejected. At the pet store we found this clear double sided tape sheets designed for furniture... it works, that and beating the kitty... he does not attack the couch anymore.

[Falconess]

mmm gotta love the special attention that cats require. Granted, I'd still take 'em over dogs anyday.