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  • I don't have one so you don't get one.

    Hi. My name is Kmag. I've read The Devil's Panties for quite some time now but for some reason never really though "Hey, Forum, might want to join..." Honestly, my plan for today was to read though the archives (yet again cus it's awesome) then Email Jennie to tell her that's she cool. (yeah sounds lame but everything else was "How awesome she is.", "How I wish I could have her babies" and "How I'm going to find out where she lives so I can stand outside of her window and try to take her talent with evil, evil, naughty Zoot standing by to shine the Grail shaped light so we could lure in knights to castle Anthrax.") Hope I can keep up posting because I do become lazy after my introduction, mostly because I run out of cocoa and only one other forum as been able to keep my attention and it's not because I'm sleeping with a mod....

    Ok it's because i'm sleeping with the mod and he dose naughty things to the forums like banning everyone for giggles.

    Talk to you later! Kmag
    The Thing I Fear The Most: Flying Spider Scorpions who are really the Evil Soul to Dan Rather.
    He very much enjoyed the look she was giving him. Somewhere between wanting to murder him and wanting to murder him. Epic Islands
    She very well might become an acquaintance you never forget my sister

  • #2
    *perches on a high-rise and sniffs the air* I think I smell newbie

    *tips head to the side and looks around* Ah, yes, there's one now.... MUAHAHAHAHA

    *launches from her perch and comes screaming down out of the sky*


    *vroooooooooooom*

    *pooooouuuuuuunce*

    *nose to beak* Welcome to the Devil's Panties. May ye be warned, we are a strange bunch *nose lick*

    Is your life insurance paid up? *takes off to wait for another newbie to pass by*


    "Allias volat propriis"
    "Zhai'helleva"

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    oooo look, an eyeball *nom*

    Originally posted by stidf01
    Something tells me I have to re-educate Fal when I see her next

    P.S. I'll let you know if I survive
    Yeah, he survived, but only just

    Comment


    • #3
      *POUNCES NEWBIE*
      hehe welcome to the fourm, crash helmets to your right and multi-coloured strait jackets to your left also with a veriaty of nom nom flavours!
      Mind if i...reel you in?

      Comment


      • #4
        Yay for castle Anthrax.
        Is Zoot the one that gets the spanking?
        ooh, I wanna sleep with a mod.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by JennieB View Post
          Yay for castle Anthrax.
          Is Zoot the one that gets the spanking?
          ooh, I wanna sleep with a mod.
          Hi! ok I'm going compleatly fan girl over here like running around the house yelling woot loudly.

          Yeah, If I remember correctly it is Zoot who gets the spanking.

          I was boinking him before he became a mod but it got me a free trip to LA to play a vidieo game.

          The mini fan girl says: "ZOMGWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGZOMGWO OOOOOOOOOT!!"
          The Thing I Fear The Most: Flying Spider Scorpions who are really the Evil Soul to Dan Rather.
          He very much enjoyed the look she was giving him. Somewhere between wanting to murder him and wanting to murder him. Epic Islands
          She very well might become an acquaintance you never forget my sister

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by JennieB View Post
            Yay for castle Anthrax.
            Is Zoot the one that gets the spanking?
            ooh, I wanna sleep with a mod.
            THE UNOFFICIAL OFFICIAL SCRIPT OF THE CASTLE ANTHRAX SCENE

            ZOOT
            Welcome, gentle Sir knight, welcome to the Castle Anthrax.

            GALAHAD
            The Castle Anthrax?

            ZOOT Yes. It's not a very good name, is it? But we are nice and we
            shall attend to your every ... every need!

            GALAHAD
            Er ...
            + You are the keepers of the Holy Grail?

            ZOOT
            The what? But you are tired and you must rest awhile. Midget! Crapper!

            MIDGET AND CRAPPER
            Yes, O Zoot?

            ZOOT
            Prepare a bed for our guest.

            MIDGET AND CRAPPER
            (groveling with delight)
            Oh thank you, Zoot, thank you, thank you.

            ZOOT
            Away varletesses!
            (to GALAHAD)
            The beds here are warm and soft and very, very big.

            GALAHAD
            Well, look er, I ...

            ZOOT
            What is your name, handsome knight?

            GALAHAD
            Er ... Sir Galahad... the Chaste.

            ZOOT
            Mine is Zoot. Just Zoot
            (she is very close to him for a moment)
            But come.

            She turns away and leads him towards a door leading to a corner
            leading to the bedchamber

            GALAHAD
            Well Look, I'm afraid I really ought to be ...

            ZOOT
            Sir Galahad!!

            There is a gasp from the other GIRLS

            ZOOT
            You would not be so ungallant as to refuse our hospitality.

            GALAHAD looks at the other GIRLS. They are clearly on the verge of
            being offended.

            GALAHAD
            Well ...

            ZOOT
            (she moves off and GALAHAD unwillingly follows) I'm afraid our
            life must seem very dull and quiet compared to yours. We are but
            eightscore young blondes, all between sixteen and nineteen-and-a-half,
            cut off in this castle, with no one to protect us. Oooh. It is a
            lonely life ... bathing ... dressing ... undressing ... making
            exciting underwear....

            They reach the end of the corridor and enter the bedchamber.
            ZOOT turns

            ZOOT
            We are just not used to handsome knights ...
            (she notices him limping)
            But you are wounded!

            GALAHAD
            No, It's nothing!

            ZOOT
            You must see the doctors immediately.
            (she claps again)
            You must lie down.

            She almost forces him to lie on the bed as PIGLET and WINSTON enter
            the room. They are equally beautiful and dressed exotically. They
            approach GALAHAD.

            PIGLET
            Well, what seems to be the trouble?

            GALAHAD
            They're doctors?

            ZOOT
            They have a basic medical training, yes. Now you must try to
            rest. Dr. Winston! Dr. Piglet! Practice your art!!

            WINSTON
            Try to relax.

            GALAHAD
            No look, really, this isn't nescess ...

            PIGLET
            We must examine you.

            GALAHAD
            There's nothing wrong with ... that.

            PIGLET
            (slightly irritated)
            Please ... we are doctors.

            ZOOT reappears. GALAHAD tries for one brief moment to relax. Then
            there is a sharp boing from the lower part of his armor. WINSTON
            glances quickly in the appropriate direction as GALAHAD sits up and
            starts getting off the bed and collecting his armor, saying:

            GALAHAD
            No, no, this cannot be. I am sworn to chastity!

            PIGLET
            Back to your bed! At once!

            GALAHAD
            I'm sorry, I must go.

            GALAHAD hurries to the door and pushes through it. As he leaves the
            room we CUT TO the reverse to show that he is now in a room full of
            bathing and romping GIRLIES, all innocent, wide-eyed and
            beautiful. They smile enchantingly at him as he tries to keep walking
            without being diverted by the lovely sights assaulting his
            eyeballs. He nods to them stiffly once or twice and then his eye
            catches a particularly stunning YOUNG LADY. He visibly gulps with
            repressed emotion and cannot resist saying:

            |
            | GALAHAD
            | Good evening ... Ah, Zoot! Er ...
            |
            | DINGO
            | No, I am Zoot's identical twin sister, Dingo.
            |
            | GALAHAD
            | Oh. Well, I'm sorry, but I must leave immediately.
            |
            | DINGO
            | (very dramatically)
            | No! Oh, no! Bad ... bad Zoot.
            |
            | GALAHAD
            | Er, why?
            |
            | DINGO
            | She has been lying again ... she told us you had promised to
            | stay for ever!
            |
            | GALAHAD
            | Oh!
            +
            + GALAHAD
            + Oh ... will you excuse me?
            +
            + DINGO
            + Where are you going?
            +
            + GALAHAD
            + I have seen the Grail! I have seen it - here in this castle!
            +
            + DINGO
            + No! Oh, no! Bad ... bad Zoot!
            +
            + GALAHAD
            + What is it?
            +
            + DINGO
            + Bad, wicked, naughty Zoot! She has been setting fire to our beacon, which -
            + I have just remembered - is grail-shaped ... It is not the first time we've
            + had this problem.
            +
            + GALAHAD
            + It's not the real Grail?
            +
            +
            DINGO
            Wicked wicked Zoot ... she is a bad person and she must pay the
            penalty. And here in Castle Anthrax, we have but one punishment
            ... you must tie her down on a bed ... and spank her. Come!

            GIRLS
            A spanking! A spanking!

            DINGO
            You must spank her well and after you have spanked her you may
            deal with her as you like and then ... spank me.

            AMAZING
            And spank me!

            STUNNER
            And me.

            LOVELY
            And me.

            DINGO
            Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking!

            GIRLS
            A spanking. A spanking. There is going to be a spanking tonight.

            DINGO
            And after the spanking ... the oral sex.

            GALAHAD
            Oh, dear! Well, I...

            GIRLS
            The oral sex ... The oral sex.

            GALAHAD
            Well, I suppose I could stay a BIT longer.

            At this moment there is a commotion behind and SIR LAUNCELOT and
            CONCORD, possibly plus GAWAIN, burst into the bathing area with swords
            drawn and form themselves round SIR GALAHAD threatening the GIRLS.

            LAUNCELOT
            Sir Galahad!

            GALAHAD
            Oh ... hello ...

            LAUNCELOT
            Quick!

            GALAHAD
            Why?

            LAUNCELOT
            You are in great peril.

            DINGO
            No he isn't

            LAUNCELOT
            Silence! Foul temptress!

            GALAHAD
            Well, she's got a point.

            LAUNCELOT
            We'll cover your escape!

            GALAHAD
            Look - I'm fine!

            GIRLS
            Sir Galahad!

            He threatens DINGO.

            GALAHAD
            No. Look, I can tackle this lot single-handed!

            GIRLS
            Yes, yes, let him Tackle us single-handed!

            LAUNCELOT
            Come Sir Galahad, quickly!

            GALAHAD
            No, really, I can cope. I can handle this lot easily!

            DINGO
            Yes, let him handle us easily.

            LAUNCELOT
            No sir. Quick!

            He starts pulling GALAHAD away.

            GALAHAD
            No, please. Please! I can defeat them! There's only a hundred.

            GIRLS
            He will beat us easily. We haven't a chance.

            DINGO
            Oh shit!

            By now LAUNCELOT and CONCORDE have hustled GALAHAD out of the bathing
            area and are running through the outside door.

            LAUNCELOT
            We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril.

            GALAHAD
            (dragging his feet somewhat)
            I don't think I was.

            LAUNCELOT
            You were, Sir Galahad, You were in terrible peril.

            GALAHAD
            Look, let me go back in there and face the peril?

            LAUNCELOT
            It's too perilous.

            They are right outside the castle by now.

            GALAHAD
            Look, it's my duty as a knight to try and sample as much peril as I can.

            LAUNCELOT
            No, no, we must find the Grail.

            The thunderstorm is over. A bunch (sic) of PAGES are tethered to a
            tree with more MEN waiting. Their tethers are untied and the PAGES
            start banging away with their coconuts. GALAHAD is swept along with
            them as they ride off.

            GALAHAD
            Oh, let me go and have a bit of peril?

            LAUNCELOT
            No. It's unhealthy.

            GALAHAD
            ... I Bet you're gay.

            LAUNCELOT
            No, I'm not.

            GAWAIN or CONCORDE gives a knowing glance at LAUNCELOT. VOICE comes in as
            they ride off.

            VOICE OVER
            Sir Launcelot had saved Galahad from almost certain
            temptation but they were still lost, far from the goal of their search
            for the Holy Grail. Only Bedevere and King Arthur himself, riding day
            and night, had made any progress.
            Wandering Minds: Soap for the Brain
            http://kiltman.comicgenesis.com
            Twitter : @kiltmancomics
            Originally posted by JennieB
            While it is a sweet thought, please, no strippers.

            Comment


            • #7
              A newbie, a Jennie post and some Monty Python all in one topic? I daresay this is a topic of victory, made entirely of win and sprinkled with Goddess.
              This has been a Jurgen Q. Mudveins message, brought to you in part by Whiskey Tango Foxknot communications, a division of Apathy Inc. (Because we don't care).

              Comment


              • #8
                now all we need is bacon
                [/QUOTE] and Captain Kitty says.... "Oooooooh! You kinky bitch!" [/QUOTE]

                Originally posted by RazorJAK
                Yeah yeah, you're the type of girl who would be whispering "Safewords are for quitters." in my ear. :-P
                http://www.zazzle.com/shalla/

                Comment


                • #9
                  wisconsin pounces da newbie
                  Red meat is NOT bad for you... GREEN FUZZY MEAT is bad for you

                  Member of IWW I.U. 660

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    hehe has to be done

                    iiiiiits BACON!!!
                    ...now im hungery, think ill make a full english and finish of my tub of choc icecream!
                    Mind if i...reel you in?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Yay! it's a noobfest!

                      You see a truck slowing as it approaches you, The driver steps out in the oddest mix of cowboy/pirate/rock attire you can imagine. He goes to the back of the truck and unloads a couple pallets of beer at your feet. "You're gonna need this" he says as he steps back to the cab and drives off into the barely visible distance.You see the truck flip around and head back in your direction gaining speed. As it nears you can see a maniacal grin under the cowboy hat, and hear a loud "YEEEEE HAW" echo over the roar of the engine. As the truck tops out at 75 mph the door swings open and 260 pounds of hair, denim, and leather hit you square in the chest!As you are rolled over repeatedly, the truck follows suit in the distance, exploding in a ball of flame. You stop rolling beside the pallets of beer, just as the driver stands up catches a bottle thrown from the explosion."Hmmmmmm....wonder if I have to pay for that......." he ponders out loud while offering you a hand and a beer with a grin. "Hi, I'm Gypsy" he says as he helps you pick up body parts. "You may want these, even though you're gonna loose em again soon........."
                      sigpic I'M A PRETTY GODDAMNED PRINCESS!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Tipouf View Post
                        now all we need is bacon
                        bacon ?, yes, on a fried egg sandwich, with a dollop of ketchup
                        Red meat is NOT bad for you... GREEN FUZZY MEAT is bad for you

                        Member of IWW I.U. 660

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by MNsane View Post
                          bacon ?, yes, on a fried egg sandwich, with a dollop of ketchup
                          that sounds soo yummy...but I'm eating Hot Dogs.
                          The Thing I Fear The Most: Flying Spider Scorpions who are really the Evil Soul to Dan Rather.
                          He very much enjoyed the look she was giving him. Somewhere between wanting to murder him and wanting to murder him. Epic Islands
                          She very well might become an acquaintance you never forget my sister

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Bacon and eggs wrapped hotdogs?!?!?

                            YES PLEZ!!!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Ray View Post
                              Bacon and eggs wrapped hotdogs?!?!?

                              YES PLEZ!!!
                              Better patent and market that, Ray.


                              Wanna chat with other forumites? Hit irc.aniverse.com and join the #devil'spanties channel.

                              Comment

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